Read by Jenny Wagler

My dear Doctor:

This kind of panic, I can never bring myself to speak of it.

I am a swimming coach; I can, at one go, swim 3 km freestyle, however all the time I’m terrified that I’ll drown and die. I fear water and always feel that I’m on the verge of drowning, to the extent that even in a tiny, shallow swimming pool, these images constantly flash through my mind.

Once I saved the lives of nineteen people who had fallen into the water and were at their last gasp, but I can’t trade this and instead save myself from my own fear of “sinking ever downward.”

After I’ve written this letter, I’m going to go for a solo swim across a strange yet beautiful lake. If I make it to the shore, I’ll resign from my job, and forever escape this nightmare. If I don’t make it, please guard this preposterous secret for me.

Pray for me and wish me luck!

P.S. Yesterday evening, suddenly, my pet fish’s belly turned white and he died. Could this be an inauspicious omen? I’m extremely depressed.

Qin ai de yisheng:

Guanyu zheyang de konghuang, wo yizhi shuo bu chu kou.

Wo shi ge youyong jiaolian, keyi yong zi shi yikouqi youwan sanqian gongchi, dan wo que shishi dou you nibi de kongju! Wo pa shui, zong juede ziji jijiang mieding, shenzhi zai xiaoxiao qianqian de yongchili, zheyang de huamian dou hui buduan de fuxian.

Cengjing wo jiu qi guo shijiu tiao shui chuiwei de shengming, que yi dian ye wu fa huan jiu ziji duiyu “bu duan chen lun” de haipa. Xiexin gei ni hou, wo jiang duzi you guo yi mosheng er meili de hu. Ruguo shang de liao an, wo jiang ci qu gongzuo, yongyuan tuo li zheyang de mengyan. Ruguo shang bu liao an, qing ni ti wo yongyuan baoshou zhe ge huangdan de mimi.

Wei wo qidao yu zhufu ba!

Zuo wan wo yang de yu turan dupi fan bai, si le. Zhe hui shi bu xiang de yuzhao ma? Wo jusang jile.

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